On nic fits and fun with fleas
It's Friday! (doing the Friday happy dance). In other news, I have only had one cigarette ALL DAY!
I have been trying to quit for a long time. Since September last year, I've been a very casual, weekend-only kind of smoker. January 13th was the first day of school and I suddenly saw my intake go from 1 or 2 a day at most to 3, then 4, then 5 and I think yesterday I had 6 cigarettes. I really want one right now! Luckily, I don't have any with me.
I've been really ambivalent about quitting. You know what made me start smoking more again? French class. I have this silly, romantic notion of sitting with my lov-ah in a cafe in Paris smoking and drinking coffee and talking about love, life and the pursuit of happiness. I've never been to Paris, but that's the image I've been hanging on to my whole life. I know that by the time I do get to visit, smoking will be banned in all public places so I'll have to let that one go too (like the Irish pub, drink a pint, smoke a cigarette fantasy).
Also, I really love old movies and they are always smoking in them. I think it's tres distingue' (ok, I don't have any accents working on my keyboard right now). I know it's really bad for me, blah blah blah. I know it's stinky. Really stinky. I know it's expensive, too, but it's way cheaper than my latte habit and I'm not giving that up any time soon.
The main motivation (besides the obvious, I don't want to have a stroke or die from COPD) goes back to the snob factor. I think standing outside smoking anywhere looks kinda white trashy. I hate that. If I run down to the Walmart to pick up some tampons, the last thing I want to do is stand outside the Walmart and smoke a cigarette! But being in or near a Walmart stresses me out and makes me want to have a cigarette. Besides that, in California, smoking in public is almost the worst thing you can do. I'd be better off I was a leper! It's that bad.
So, while part of me wants to give a big f-off to the OC, and anyone else who pretends to care, the other part of my does think it's a ridiculous and nasty habit.
I think I've found a few diversions to help ward off the dreaded mid-afternoon nic fit, though. Blogging is good. Knitting something is good. Going for a brisk walk is good. A nap would be even better.
My weekend agenda: de-flea. The weirdest thing happened last week. We noticed that we have fleas. Or the cat does. I have no idea how that happened. We live in a second floor flat and our cat never goes outside. Someone must've snuck into our apartment and purposely planted a girl flea and a boy flea on the cat. They have been merrily multiplying so now we really have an issue. Damn fleas!
posted by Anita at
4:08 PM
2 comment(s):
Having been to Paris somewhat recently, I guarantee you smoking will never be banned there as it has been here. I actually made an exception and smoked all through Paris. Good luck with the quitting. I stopped at the beginning of the year...so far, so good.
By
Anonymous, at
6:06 AM
Was there last month. Tres cher! Watch out for dog poop. Sight from the Arc de Triomphe is gorgeous. Louvre is large (figuratively and physically). Eiffel Tower is extreme.
By
Anonymous, at
8:09 PM
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